Just Listen...

 Communication...do we really listen? 

I have spent so much time thinking about relationships this past year, since that has literally been the definition of our vocation for 2 decades.

    And, I feel this thought in the photo below sums up so much…

And I would also add--choices that say, "I choose US."

   Yes—we absolutely have to look out for our own spirit and mental health. But, relationships are also so much about the daily give-and-take that we allow one another.

  Our current society mindset has often become so completely focused on self-love, that we cannot bend to allow for the shortcomings of another in their bad days or seasons. 

   We all have bad days / seasons, where we are not our best selves, don’t we? And, we desperately need someone to commit to loving and helping us through our dark times. May we humbly remember …others need the same from us.

   We sometimes need to just…be quiet…and let the other person talk—even when we disagree with what they are saying. Letting someone’s concerns and voice be heard without retaliation or ‘fixing’ in the moment, can be so impactful—it communicates, “I care about knowing what you think.”

  For myself, I find it so often to be true...once I have had the chance to voice my concerns, I feel that, in a way, I have ‘set something down.’ I then can have the emotional freedom to agree-to-disagree on a matter, forgive someone in my heart, and move forward to continue a good relationship in the areas where we do agree. 

  Dan and I have almost 20 years of marriage together—but we do not claim to have all the answers, and we constantly pray for God to help us stay focused on Him and enjoy many more years together. ❤️

  **May we never assume we have the right to look at what we know of someone’s life or a broken relationship and decide we know why it happened—we don’t.

  Yes…, I do believe there are instances that require someone to walk away from a relationship.

     I have many brave friends who have had to take that step out alone—and I LOVE you; I am FOR you! ❤️🙏🏻 

     This thought has been a great reminder for me through the years, …to love through good and bad seasons, and never forget the importance of open, but not antagonistic, communication. Are we really a safe space for our loved ones to share? We say that—but... do they know our immediate return will be to correct or ‘fix them’ to our way of thinking? Isn't that so often how we listen?! Man...ouch...convicting thought. I pray for God to help me constantly work on communication in my relationships!

A link to the Healthy Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe...

Here is a link to my Happy & Healthy at Home blogpost about healthy delicious Chocolate Chip Cookies. (Until I can figure out how to get the link to show up on the mobile blog version. Enjoy!

https://happyhealthycallaghanclan.blogspot.com/

Me...Afraid? Yes!

Joshua 1:9, “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”

This verse has meant so much to me over the years. As a very shy young person I dealt with many insecurities in my life. I had the privilege of growing up in an amazing Christian home. I had parents who gave me an amazing example of a strong and healthy marriage and a happy home, an invaluable advantage in life!

However, it seems God gives every person different areas of challenge to overcome in their lives on their journey to please Him and live their best life. One of my challenges was overcoming fear in many different aspects of life. I am definitely more of an introverted personality. God has helped me learn over the years how to change my fear of the reaction of others into a desire to meet their needs, despite their reaction to me. That is definitely a constant process--I daily need His help!

One verse that played a great role in my reaching a more biblical mindset in the area of fear is Joshua 1:9. God did not suggest that Joshua be strong and courageous, He commanded it!

There is a big work to be done for our Lord; it's a privilege! But, this work will never be accomplished if we as ladies get caught up in our fears. God is bigger than any circumstance in our lives or in the world around us! 

As Christians, we need not dwell in our own insecurities, but rather rise up...again...after each moment of fear, with our strength and confidence in God!

May the Lord be with you today, in those moments when fear tries to creep in. Remember, He commands us to be strong--so we have the power to do it! Let's go make today AMAZING! 

Take a Deep Breath...Look Past the Stuff and at the People!

How many of you do not operate well or think clearly in the middle of clutter? ME!

I literally have the hardest time sitting down in a room with things that need to be put away, and concentrating on anything else. It's like everything is sitting there staring at me, silently saying..."So? What are you going to do about it?"

But when I am tempted to get frustrated at my kids for leaving their mess or I am tempted to give in to that urge to...stop whatever it is that I am supposed to be doing and turn on 'turbo-cleaning angry-mom mode,' God so often gently reminds me to think about the people who belong to those things. My relationship with them is so much more important than the temporary mess they have made!

Do I teach my kids to clean up their own mess? Um, that would definitely be a YES. We are absolutely working to teach our children to be responsible human beings, to think about the fact that they share their space with others coming after them. And, I will say, as they are growing up that is getting much easier with less reminding!

But, let's be honest, none of us are always at our best. We all have times where we think more of our own interests than the interests and feelings of others, and my kids are not an exception to that. In fact, neither am I! I have my own areas of selfishness. It may not be in leaving my clutter, but I have areas I know I am constantly at work.

Whatever stage of life we are in, we all have people who need us to see them and love them right where they are--despite their shortcomings.

So...the take-away from my ramblings today I guess would be...Look Past the Stuff and See the People! 

May God give each of you a wonderful day...right where you are at...because He CAN!

Time to Think About Sodium...

We talk about eating healthy without refined sugars and extra fat, but I propose that it's time we think about sodium as well!

Believe me...no one loves good SALTY fries better than this girl! And I certainly have no intentions of cutting salt completely out of my diet. :)

However, I think where the excess salt comes into our diet is not through the salt shaker. It hides out in so many of our different packaged foods and processed foods. Things we tend to also give to our kids as 'easy lunch foods' every day, chips, crackers, lunchmeat, snack bars, etc. And, our family does eat those things also...I just try to make that more in moderation--looking for lower sodium snacks or bake/make my own. 

But that sodium especially hides out in fast foods and restaurant foods in astounding numbers! I mean crazy amounts of salt. 

I have not been one to take time to think about how much sodium my family is eating. But after eating at home for pretty much every meal the past few months with very little outside food that I have not prepared and being a more healthy-minded, plan-ahead grocery shopper, I can definitely see that this makes a difference! This is an important part of my family's health and will also help to deter future health problems in their life.

So, we have been trying this out with our seasonings. Actually, I have been. My kids don't really know about it yet, but they have eaten it for many days and not even noticed. :)

I still use salt, but I have been using the Nutritional Yeast in place of adding extra salt or even as a sprinkle on top of soup, etc. 

Observations:

- It takes a good liberal sprinkle to add more flavor in my opinion.

- It does have a unique taste just by itself, but added in with most things is not distinguishable.

- It is not a 'Fix-All' salt substitute, but it does add enough flavor to lessen the salt needed--and that's what I was going for. 

- So...yes, I recommend!

We tried it on my home-popped popcorn tonight. With melted Unsalted Butter, Lots of N.Y., and just a little sprinkle of salt! 

 As you can see...it was enjoyed...

Low sodium popcorn that actually added to their digestive health; I call that a win!

I feel like just slight changes here and there, and all things in moderation definitely help for an overall healthy diet. Perfect? No, because let's be real...life get's busy and sometimes you just need to grab...

An In-N-Out Double Double Burger with Animal Fries!

But, working on our mindset and the mindset of our kids to think overall healthy and balanced in their food choices. 

Perhaps a Great Gift of Time...

As I left my house the other morning, I saw a whole family...dad, mom, and three kids...

all out taking a bike ride together, smiling and enjoying each other and life in general!

Can I just say that, amidst all the chaos and uncertainty of these times, I think the families of our country have received a great gift...a chance to see what life with each other could be, how deep our relationships could be, when everything superfluous is removed from our daily activities.

So many of us have stopped--out of necessity--and looked for ways to make our time at home fun and special. Most families are spending the majority of their time every day together, thinking ahead and planning different and fun ways to connect!

Yes, we can find the bad in our current situation--we always can. And, I am not making light of the seriousness of this pandemic. But, we can always find things that cause us to fear. We can contemplate and dwell on motives and reasons for these situations that will invoke doubts in our hearts..Sure. But today, I choose to see the good!

Seeing them all out together made me stop and wonder just how long it has been since families, like that one, have set aside everything on a Saturday morning and just taken a bike ride together, the whole family. How long since we set aside work responsibilities, all the sports practices and games, all the extracurricular school activities and personal hobbies, and just loved each other?

Time translates to love in any language. Giving my time says to another, "I care enough about you to stop everything I am doing to just be there and listen."

I pray that, with the reopening of America, our 'normal' will not be quite the same.

We will not forget these precious days with family! May the Lord grant each family the ability to see the gift of those who live in our home in the next few days or weeks ahead before we resume the busyness of every-day life!

Our Time = Our Life

I Kings 3:4 "And the king went to Gibeon to sacrifice there; for that was the great high place: a thousand burnt offerings did Solomon offer upon that altar."

Think how LONG it must have taken King Solomon to sacrifice 1,000 burnt offerings?! I cannot imagine. Our time is our life, therefore the most precious thing we possess. This is the greatest thing we can give back to God.

Solomon must have set aside many hours to sacrifice to God. When was the last time we set aside any time for God, let alone hours?

Thank you, God, for this convicting reminder to set aside time in this fast-paced life we live, to be still and know that You are God!

This is a thought that I shared a long time ago and enjoyed reading it once again as a great reminder for my own life.

An Easter Lesson from my 9-year-old...

Hmmm...wafers or cake layers...you guess?

Every year, I make our annual tri-color Easter Cake with home-made fondant (which is SO easy, by the way) or a thick cream cheese or buttercream icing, a nest made of toasted coconut and some mini Cadbury eggs inside the nest. We love it--it's a fluffy and delicious recipe from scratch, and it looks so pretty.

Here is our cake from last year...

The picture below is of our layers from this year. Impressive height, don't you think? Ha ha!

When they came out of the oven I was tempted to toss them all and start over. But, my 9 year old daughter was very proud of them!

She is slowly getting old enough to help more and more; and be more adventurous on her own. Yeah, they got totally over-mixed. I knew it and prayed as they went in the oven. But, they came out just as flat as I knew they would be.

But you know what, I don't think God wanted them to rise and be fluffy. I think he wanted this perfectionist mama to learn yet another lesson from my kids!

God reminded me that we don't just toss it because it's not perfection. He doesn't, and I'm so glad!

She had SO much fun in the kitchen with me. Listening to Disney Princess music, laughing, spilling flour all over the place, and mixing...mixing...mixing...that batter. She did most of it all by herself, she was so excited. It was HER best!

God just wants our best! So, He challenged me as I looked at those humble layers--Helen...take her best and be satisfied, be proud and encourage her to keep being her best self!

So, the next time we are tempted to expect others around to measure up to what "We Think" their best should be...remember the Easter Cake! Look at them, encourage them, praise their victories no matter how small they seem, and take their best...right where it's at!

So, we just added lots of cream cheese icing and strawberries, I let her do all the candy decor this year (Kit Kat with a pretty ribbon bow to hold it all together for the win) and celebrated her personal victory!

New Healthy Snacks and Treats Blog...

Chocolate?? YES, please!

Well...we all have lots of time at home for the moment, don't we?!

And, if I am honest with myself, the months previous to this one have not been good food choice months. When life gets busy, we just grab what is easiest. Whenever I cook, it's almost always home-made and healthy--thanks to a mama who taught me that was important!

Snacking, on the other hand...takes some thought and prep to make it healthy. But, there really are so many ways to do it, without spending lots of time. So, I thought maybe it would be helpful to share some of our easy family favorites with all the others wishing for the same thing right now.

I felt that this was the perfect opportunity for a snacking reset! I know how to do it, I know our favorites, now it's time to get back to it--taking the little bit of extra time and creating more healthy snacking options for my family.

I have opened up another branch off of this blog to share some of our tried and true favorites and some new healthy snack recipes we have tried. If you were wishing for some options that are easy and healthy during this 'highly encouraged' home-time, then feel free to click the link below and try one out! (If you will simply add your email under 'subscribe' at the top, you will receive an email each time I post a new recipe or snack idea.)

We will be adding as we go; here's your link--Enjoy!

Healthy Snacking Recipes!

Mama, You Can Do It!

Hey, Mama! Are you completely maxed-out?

**Sharing a post I drafted a long while back and never published. 

Have you ever been in a season of life where you as wife, mom--or whatever relationship title you hold--have to just adopt a 'survival mode?'

In July of 2015, our third child, Trent Michael James, was born. What a gift from God; we love him so much!

I noticed after he was born, however, that for increasing minutes/hours of the day and night, he would just cry. There was really no consistent way to comfort him. After several doctor visits and a few tests, our doctor (who was a practicing pedatrician for well over 20 years) told us he believed this to be one of the worst cases of colic he has ever worked with. Just what an exhausted mom with 2 other kids, a husband and a job, really wanted to hear! 

Mainly because...there is no quick fix, cure or built-in ending for colic. Their body just has to right itself on its own time table. I know everyone has a suggestion and a natural remedy to try...believe me...you name it, I tried it! (*Although weekly chiropractic adjustments for the baby did add temporary relief, and were the salvation of my sanity!)

It lasted for 5 months...(tap the microphone)...MONTHS, not weeks or days. He screamed pretty much non-stop for 5 months.

I had 2 other kids, a husband and job. Life simply had to keep going. So, I adopted survival mode. Making sure my kids and husband were fed and their clothes were clean for the next day. That's it. A monumental task, I might add, with a screaming child in my arms literally all day long. (You do NOT want to know what my house looked like during those months; and I am a HUGE house perfectionist!)

I have always been very healthy minded when it comes to food, thanks to the training of my awesome mom. My meals are not usually 'fatty' and 'junky.' I always cooked and prepared 3 healthy meals a day.

During those months, needless to say, I got away from healthy and drifted to quick and easy--whatever that was! My kids still got fruit and veggies, just randomly. And don't beat yourself up if that's what season you are in right now! Your kids will survive. :)

Yes, I got a little stuck in a rut. Oh, I got back to cooking healthy dinners for the most part, but our snacking and 'grab and go' habits really affected our food routines. Slowly over the next year or so, I got back to healthy cooking and snacking habits. (I will share a post this week of an AWESOME healthy pancake recipe I found, fluffy delicious and super healthy--very much kid approved!)

I just felt like God would have me share this post, several years later, to encourage any mamas out there who are in a crazy season of some kind. You're doing fine! God can use you right where you are. He gave you those kids or that life situation knowing you would be the very best at it! (...with His help, of course!) Be patient with yourself and just take little steps at a time.

If you are a mom in a crazy season of life--totally in survival mode--we all get that. It happens sometimes. Don't beat yourself up; do what you can do for right now. Prioritize! Your house should be secondary during these seasons to the people that live in them! And, believe me, it pains this perfectionist to even say that. :) But God taught me a LOT about priorities during that season of my life!

Follow along if you want to share some of my favorite healthy brands, healthy meal tips and recipes and just for-real moments God has taught me along the way. My posts are usually very short and to the point. I know 'mom down time' is extremely valuable. :)

Feel free to share some of your favorite healthy snacks or tips in the comments too!